Connect with us

Dating & Relationships

Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated

Published

on

Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated

As it was found during the latest research on family relations– the Benefits from Marriage could be overrated by comparing all the pros and cons. So, previously praised family values become a great myth of the 20th century and the idea of married people having more health and happiness than those that simply live together is claimed to be false. Even such an advantage as the honeymoon period is a short-lived phenomenon. And the time and money intended for the marriage could be spent better way.Benefits from Marriage are Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated

During the previous studies, which were mainly comparing the life of married people with that of single ones, the weds were observed to live a longer life. But while evaluating the lives of weds and cohabitant couples, there were more pros than cons for the second option.

For this particular research, US experts examined data on the long-term progress of people’s relationships provided by the National Survey of Families and Households. The sample was composed of 2,737 single people of both sexes and 896 weds or cohabitants who moved in during the last 6 years.Benefits from Marriage are Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated

Dr. Kelly Musick, the lead author from the College of Human Ecology at Cornell University in New York, said:

Marriage has long been an important social institution, but in recent decades western societies have experienced increases in cohabitation, before or instead of marriage, and increases in children born outside of marriage.These changes have blurred the boundaries of marriage, leading to questions about what difference marriage makes in comparison to alternatives.”

She also said:

We found that differences between marriage and cohabitation tend to be small and dissipate after a honeymoon period. Also, while married couples experienced health gains – likely linked to the formal benefits of marriage such as shared healthcare plans – cohabiting couples experienced greater gains in happiness and self-esteem.”

She also added:

Marriage has long been an important social institution – but differences between marriage and cohabitation are small and dissipate after a honeymoon period. For some, cohabitation may come with fewer unwanted obligations than marriage and allow for more flexibility, autonomy, and personal growth.”

The study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family showed that regardless of the status (either marriage or cohabitation) in both cases couples tend to reduce their contact with parents and friends for a long time.Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated2 Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated
The researchers wrote:

We found no evidence that marriage and cohabitation provide benefits over being single in the realm of social ties.”

But the improved psychological condition is still a no doubt advantage for couples with any kind of commitment.
The researchers concluded the following:

We are certainly not saying that marriage is irrelevant for individual well-being. What we have found is simply that, once individual differences are taken into account, it is far from a blanket prescription for individual well-being. To those in highly conflicted marriages or who have gone through a divorce, this sociological insight is only a firm grasp of the obvious.Benefits from Marriage are Exaggerated

They also added:

At the same time, for many others, marriage is a great source of happiness and well-being that is expected to be for a lifetime, or at least for a portion of the life course. Recent campaigns to promote marriage are based on the assumption that marriage will improve the well-being of individuals, and in a context of scarce resources, they divert time and money away from other policy levers.”

Myths about being married

  1. Myth: You should never feel rejected.

 

Truth: You are two individuals with distinct wants, temperaments, and day-to-day changes. You’re going to reject each other at times. What matters is that you allow for the sensations that may arise as a result and learn to make each other feel better, not worse.

 

 

  1. Myth: It shouldn’t be difficult to feel connected to your partner.

 

In a long-term relationship, it’s easy to get into behavioral ruts. Perhaps you watch TV on different sides of the sofa every night, have dinner together, or read books together, but you don’t feel emotionally connected. We are creatures of habit and comfort. To have those deep interactions, you must step outside of your comfort zone and put in the effort. There may be moments when you must work hard to be connected in a long-term relationship.

 

  1. Myth: We should have similar interests.

 

True, having a few activities you like doing with your spouse is beneficial, but they don’t have to be expensive. They may be as basic as going for a nightly stroll, experimenting with new cooking cuisines, or conversing about literature or the news. Anything that helps you connect works, and sometimes the simplest things are the greatest since they can be done at any moment.

 

  1. Myth: We shouldn’t fight.

 

Relationship conflict is unavoidable. Disagreement arises because you view things differently, prioritize differently, or desire different things. This makes sense since it would be dull to be married to a carbon copy of oneself who never disagreed. What matters is that you listen, validate, and achieve a compromise. It might take some time…

 

  1. Myth: We should both want to make up after a quarrel.

 

Truth: People’s temperaments differ. Some people recover fast, while others require longer time to return to their baseline. It doesn’t imply your lover doesn’t love you if they require time to warm back up to you. What matters is that you individually understand what you require to feel secure bonding again.

  1. Living together before marriage benefits the relationship.

Remember, Francine Klagsbrun is not a Christian writer, but in her research, she sees this common, seemingly harmless argument as a myth and ultimately dangerous for the good health of a marriage. She observes that living together does not improve the chances of a successful relationship. Oh, some of these relationships succeed to a point, or they succeed despite, but not because of, this arrangement. When or if a marriage happens, the easy attitude of transitory commitment is frequently carried to the marriage itself. The author says that couples who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce than those who wait to marry before living together.

 

We can cite Scripture (I Corinthians 6:9) to condemn this practice, but it is a real eye-opener when even non-Christian counselors warn of the negative impact that these types of living arrangements can have on a long-term relationship.

 

  1. Have an Affair to Rejuvenate Your Marriage

How many times have you seen this as a subject in a movie or book? “I’ll make my partner envious and upset, and this will make them love me even more.” Of course, solutions to problems in marriage never come from outside the relationship, especially immoral and hurtful solutions. Being hurt and humiliated never causes anyone to love more.

 

Christians would not contemplate this for obvious reasons, but many others do and suffer as a result.

 

  1. Be Prepared for Sex to Become Boring

It’s interesting that individuals feel this about sex in marriage while continuing to enjoy their bowling passion for forty years. This myth instills in men a dread of commitment and discourages women. People wonder, “Why get married if sex would become boring? Why do my best if my sex life will be unsatisfying in the end?” If a couple maintains this sort of erroneous thinking about sex, it may become a self-fulfilling prophesy in their marriage.

 

The truth is that if you work at it, you can expect sex to become more exciting, fulfilling, and creative as the partners become more comfortable and confident in each other’s love and loyalty. Sex remains an important part of a couple’s marriage if they want to keep their romance and sex lives active and renewed.

 

9.Keep Your Independence

This concept is particularly popular today among both men and women who do not want to lose their sense of independence, even if they are married. However, being dependent is a necessary component of a happy marriage. Too much freedom in a marriage makes one feel unnecessary or irrelevant. The idea is to become affectionately reliant without being co-dependent, which is a type of servitude.

 

  1. If your spouse truly loves you, he or she will know what you want/need.

This is true for mind readers. Too many individuals consider their partner’s capacity to detect what they want or need to be the litmus test for real love. This is both impractical and unjust. In successful marriages, the partners usually take great care in patiently explaining and reinforcing what they want and need to feel loved and happy.

 

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Dating & Relationships

Hobbies That Will Help You Become A Ladies’ Man

Published

on

man and woman facing

There are many hobbies out there, but this article will focus on the ones that will make you more attractive to the ladies! Of course, you should strike a balance between having too many hobbies and becoming good at a few select options.

Salsa Dancing

Women love a man with confidence who’s willing to put themselves out there. Salsa dancing is sexy and it also offers a chance to interact with the ladies during class. Fortunately, most dance lessons are highly affordable.

Learning A European Language

You can broaden your horizons and your “dateability” by choosing to learn a new language. Women love Spanish and French, and fortunately for you, both are fairly intuitive when it comes to learning them. Most importantly, you can also advance your career with new language skills or impress Russian London escorts.

Play An Instrument

The ladies love musicians, and more importantly, they crave a man with considerable guitar, piano or violin playing skills. If you’ve abandoned playing an instrument or are new to it, it’s worth investing your time as you will up your ability to romance tenfold! Don’t forget that serenading someone or writing a love song is a great way to show your sensitive side while showcasing your awesome instrument playing skills.

Taking Snapshots

Photography is not the most masculine option we will highlight today, but women love being photographed. Learning how to edit and take stunning snapshots on your phone will make you all the more desirable to the opposite sex. From having the ability to make someone feel good to simply capturing special moments, photography skills are highly useful. Additionally, if you plan on wooing a lady, make sure you know how to properly use all of the functions provided on your camera. It’s important to capture everyone in a youthful and glamorous way because it helps them feel good.

Fighting Sports

Many men are becoming effeminate, but women desire an alpha male willing to protect them. If you want to make yourself look more attractive to ladies, participate in combat sports. From karate to kick-boxing, any sport that offers a hands-on experience will help you exude confidence while protecting your woman. Of course, certain sports such as Tai Chi are more for show than anything else. These aren’t masculine sports by any means and they won’t help you become a better person by learning self-defense.

Home Cooking Skills

No, you do not need to become a highly rated chef or even professional to prepare delicious home-cooked meals for the woman in your life. Nothing is as romantic as a finely prepared meal! Many men can’t even make their own coffee or scrambled eggs in the morning. If you’re guilty as charged, hone your cooking skills and advance yourself to the next level. By studying the fundamentals of cooking basics and learning how to at least prepare some thoughtful meals, you will show a woman your more nurturing side. The Internet is a great place to find some beginner recipes to get started. If you feel stuck, just check out some videos that can help you advance.

 

Continue Reading

Dating & Relationships

Secret Weapon of Human Attractiveness

Published

on

Secret Weapon of Human Attractiveness

Pheromones are defined in the dictionary as “chemicals secreted by an animal, especially an insect that influences the behavior of Human Attractiveness of others of the same species, often functioning as an attractant of the opposite sex”. In simple words, pheromones send certain “signals” to arouse the interest of the opposite sex. Therewith, one wouldn’t even guess what makes this exact person so seductive. Everything one will know is that he or she wants this person!

Secret Weapon of Human Attractivness

the behavior of others of the same species, often functioning as an attractant of the opposite sex”. In simple words, pheromones send certain “signals” to arouse the interest of the opposite sex

You are probably thinking that I am talking about unreal things and it is too good to be true? Well, here are some scientific facts described by the experts about the magic effect of pheromones and the way they work. The signals sent by pheromones are perceived through the organ called the Vomeronasal Organ (VMO). Pheromones mainly occur through sweat or urine. These signals are further transferred to the part of the brain called the “hypothalamus”, which is responsible for one’s emotions, hormones, reproduction, and, of course, sexual behavior.

Secret Weapon of Human Attractivness

the amazing effect is reached through the smell

Although it may seem that the amazing effect is reached through the smell, the real attraction is reached by means of chemical response to the signals from pheromones. And the entire process occurs on the unconscious level and usually leads to certain behavior like strong attraction, horniness, and rising interest in a certain person. Pheromones are a relatively recent discovery that explains the way people choose themselves partners on a subconscious level. In fact, even when we are not communicating with people verbally, we still do communicate with them by means of chemicals flying in the air.

Secret Weapon of Human Attractivness

clean and sweet-smelling body with skin totally covered with clothes

Unfortunately, nowadays there is a tendency to reduction of the number of pheromones produced by own body. The main reason for that is the evolution process of humanity as people started to use odorant treatment items in everyday life that kill the magic effect of pheromones. In the morning we take a shower with soap or shower gel and apply deodorant and clothing, so as a result, we have got a clean and sweet-smelling body with skin totally covered with clothes

So I don’t see how pheromones are supposed to overcome the borders in the face of foreign fragrances and clothes coverage. Taking into consideration all of the listed morning procedures, it doesn’t turn out as a big surprise that the amount of pheromones produced by own body is not effective enough in attracting others. Moreover, some scientists argue that only about 80% of humans have the VNO organ as it gradually became useless due to its disuse over the years.

Even though the effect of pheromones was developed relatively recently, the outcome they produce is not something to be questioned. There were many experiments performed with this groundbreaking phenomenon testing and the results showed a high success rate when they are applied.

Secret Weapon of Human Attractivness

Pheromones spread their magic effect not only on people of the opposite sex

In the everyday life, men can observe the effect of pheromones through eye contact and flirtatious smiles by women. Pheromones spread their magic effect not only on people of the opposite sex but also on everybody who is around giving them an aura of calmness and relaxation.

Despite the fact that there has been lately a wide choice of perfumes with pheromone effects, I could barely believe they have nearly as great an effect as real pheromones have. So, don’t have implicit faith in the loud words in ads of scents with pheromones. Even though the level of natural pheromones produced by one person is “prescribed” genetically and couldn’t be changed, one can start disseminating more scents with pheromones by limiting the use of various perfumed body treatment items. And don’t get surprised to observe the great increase in the number of times women will approach you!

 

Continue Reading

Dating & Relationships

Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date

Published

on

Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date2 Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date

After careful consideration and reflecting upon romantic experiences we present our essential guide for a successful first date. The dating tips we offer are summarized in five essential points. However, the most important knowledge is hidden between the lines. Please read carefully so that you would be able to find out the truths that will be most applicable in your dating life.

First dates can be both terrifying and thrilling. On the one hand, you finally get to meet the person you’ve been messaging back and forth with for weeks (or months!). On the other hand, you have to actually sit down and have a conversation with them—which can be really daunting, especially if you’re not used to it.

The good news is that there are some tried-and-true ways to make sure your first date goes off without a hitch. So whether you’re planning an intimate dinner for two or drinks at your local pub, here are some tips to keep in mind.

1. Make a plan

Planning is the foundation of every type of success. If you go with the flow you will end up where it leads you. In this way, it is not quite sure if you will get to your desired destination. This advice applies even to the most talented improvisers. So, you need to plan (at least when you do not have solid experience) all aspects of your date.

Where will you take the girl, what will you both do, what will you talk about, what will you want to know from her? In planning, you would need to consider every eventuality.

As much as you might try to plan the “perfect” date, sometimes things just don’t go according to plan. Maybe your food arrives cold or your drink gets spilled—whatever happens, try not to let it ruin your evening. After all, the point of a date is to get to know someone better, not to put unnecessary stress on yourself.

That’s why it’s always a good idea to pick an activity that’s relaxed and low-key. That way, even if things don’t go according to plan, you’ll still be able to enjoy yourself. For example, going for a walk in the park is a lot more relaxed than going out for a fancy dinner. And it gives you a chance to chat and get to know each other without feeling like the pressure’s on.

Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date1 Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date

For example, to what place you will take her if things go exceptionally well. Such a place might be another restaurant, your home, a hotel room, a friend’s apartment, or somewhere else.

In order to assure your success you always need to have a backup plan. If your first idea fails, be ready with another one – equally interesting and original.

Some women expect to spend the evening changing different locations. So, keep in your head a good number of exciting ideas.

It is important that your home is in a decent state – prepared for any event. Do not miss any opportunities – otherwise, there is a great chance not to see your date anymore. Women hate men who do not notice and do not take advantage of the chances they are being offered.Make a plan

2. Extend the best invitation.

Invite her in an original and non-traditional way. It is always good to show that you are not just someone from the crowd.
Generally, it is good to be romantic.

In a world where courtship is gradually becoming less popular, a romantic guy would be quite a refreshing sight for every girl. The place where to extend the invitation is quite important as well. Personally, I would say that the dancing floor is one of the best options.Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date There you are presented with the chance to get to know each other on a basic level. And if you are not a dancer, please learn. Dance creates a special connection between two partners, which is impossible to achieve in any other way.

Whatever you decide to do, spice it up with humour. Humour helps people relax. And when the girl starts to consider you as a source of laughter and joy she will definitely accept your invitation.

One of the most important parts of a successful first date is having good conversation starters handy. After all, if you can’t think of anything to say, the date is going to fizzle out pretty quickly. So before you head out on your date, take some time to come up with some conversation starters that will help keep the conversation flowing.

For example, you could ask about their hobbies or interests, or ask about something that’s been in the news recently. If all else fails, simply asking about their day is always a solid fallback option. The important thing is that you keep the conversation going so that things stay interesting.

3. Choose a proper activity.

Choose an interesting and mutually engaging activity for your date. The conversation would probably be one of the most important aspects of the night, so try to do things that will allow you to talk to each other.

Be mindful of the topic of the conversation. Never make notes on the first date that you’re looking for a serious relationship, that often scares people, both men, and women.

Try talking about funny things, jokes, and anecdotes, but not very embarrassing ones. Start a good on a topic that is interesting for both of you. This is important because it will leave an option for another discussion and subsequently a second date.

It is recommended on the first date not to talk about your past relationships, otherwise, your date will not feel comfortable listening to you.

And… please avoid mentioning your mother!Choose a proper activity

4. Be interested in the girl.

If your goal is simply to have sex with the girl, it will be quite difficult to achieve it. In reality, you do not need to know the woman that well, if you only want to have sex with her. However, most women have a strong radar for your intentions. If you show no interest in the girl’s personality and apply only pressure, it is pretty obvious what you want from her.

If the woman looks for other things and wants something more than just sex (which is the most common case) – you will be disappointed and probably will not see her anymore. Thus, it is important to be anxiously interested in the person you went out with- not just pretending. Do not try to mislead her that something in her is interesting for you.

Find a few things pertaining to her personality, which are appealing to you, and talk about them. In this way, you will learn more about the girl you went out with. Even if you want just sex you will have to invest some interest in your date – at least a basic level. This is a fact.

On a first date (or any date, for that matter), it’s important to be yourself. After all, if things end up getting serious down the line, you don’t want your partner finding out that you’ve been pretending to be someone else this whole time!

So instead of putting on an act or trying to be someone you’re not, just relax and be yourself. Chances are, your date will appreciate it—and if they don’t? Well, then they’re probably not worth your time anyway. Choose a proper activity

5. Sit next to her.

This is a mistake that most guys make. Men who have no experience with women do not understand that a meeting with a woman has nothing to do with a business appointment, where we gather to discuss new projects or the end of the financial year.

Women are very emotional creatures and you cannot charm them or impress them with only dry words (unless they are very desperate). Always try to sit close to her, at one hand distance.Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date2 Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date
Bonus tip: choose restaurants with sofas and not with chairs. On the sofa, it is much easier to sit next to her and to influence her through radiance or a touch. This is called kinesthesia – touches, fondling, hugging, kissing, even your smell – these are much more powerful than just words, voice, and body language.

The proper use of these tools will bring you serious success for a short amount of time. Of course, these tips will vary with culture and personality. But I feel that they could give pretty good guidance for people without a good dating background.

All in all, just remember that a first date should be fun! So relax, be yourself—and see where things go from there.

And never forget to keep trying, it will at least give you experience. Go out there and good luck!

Continue Reading

Trending