Ideally, joint sleep has to bring pleasant moments for all the weds. It seems like there could be nothing better than falling asleep while wrapping your beloved one, smelling the sweetest smell of her hair, and feeling her breath under your ear cannot enjoy Better Sex.
What a nice moment of intimacy. But in reality, we have an absolutely opposite picture, especially a couple of years after the day of marriage. While taking a glance at the bedroom of the old-time family couple, one can see people turned aside making annoying sounds, and fighting for the cover. Various preferences of weds also play a significant role: one prefers a cold room while another one likes being in warmth, one might be an owl and another one an early bird. And I can continue listing the mismatches for a couple of hours.
It appeared that couples enjoy physical closeness only at the beginning of the relationship. Their desire to sleep next to each other even overcomes their unpleasant sleeping habits. But as the years go by, people in couples start noticing the negative sides of joint sleeping which leads to mutual dissatisfaction and irritation. As the National Sleep Foundation’s “Sleep in America” poll reports, nearly 80 percent of partnered adults have problems related to sleep and the main problem is snoring.
Usually, couples consider joint sleeping a kind of ritual for commitment. According to Jeff Moran, KU associate professor of history, sharing beds is a widely-spread tradition from the past.
There’s a different approach to marriage and relationships these days though. It’s intimacy between two people, and two people only, and that doesn’t always have to be shown in the bedroom.”
I recently discovered for myself that those couples who choose separate sleeping (not only on separate beds but also in separate rooms) are quite happy in their marriage and have no problems with their sexual life. In reality not getting enough sleep is bigger intimidation for the relationship as sleeping has a direct effect on a person’s mood. People that don’t get enough sleep are more irritable and more exposed to stress, which even has a negative effect on performance in bed. According to Dennis Dailey, KU professor emeritus and sex therapist, bad sleep can lead to various psychological consequences:
Getting good sleep makes acting on our libido a lot more enjoyable-it’s a contributor.”
It is generally considered that couples that sleep apart have diminished intimacy. But strongly bound couples would be still connected despite the separate beds. Though separate sleeping doesn’t mean totally avoiding spending some pleasant moments together in bed. Emotional closeness can be also reached by physical closeness and it is not necessarily sex- it might be soft touching and hugging. In case the sleeping habits of your partner are interrupting, you both may fall asleep in the same bed and continue sleeping in different places. This way you both will not suffer from the lack of the necessary intimacy.
Physical closeness breeds emotional closeness; it’s psychology of touch, not just sex.”
During the day couples should also express their emotions more often through physical touches in case they are going to hug their pillow at night instead of their partner: hold hands while taking a walk, kiss while standing in line, and hug while laying in the front of the TV.
Sleeping apart doesn’t really lead to greater desire with couples since they are still connecting in ways like these. There is the fact, though, that absence will make the heart grow founder.”
By the way, no matter whether you sleep together or separately, you should not put sex aside:
All couples, whether they sleep in the same bed or not, should make it a point to have sex regularly. How often this should happen is a matter of negotiation.”
Remember, separate sleeping is not highly recommended, especially if you and your partner are highly compatible. In other cases don’t fear using it as a good sleep has a direct influence on your health. m
Secret Weapon of Human Attractiveness
Pheromones are defined in the dictionary as “chemicals secreted by an animal, especially an insect that influences the behavior of Human Attractiveness of others of the same species, often functioning as an attractant of the opposite sex”. In simple words, pheromones send certain “signals” to arouse the interest of the opposite sex. Therewith, one wouldn’t even guess what makes this exact person so seductive. Everything one will know is that he or she wants this person!
You are probably thinking that I am talking about unreal things and it is too good to be true? Well, here are some scientific facts described by the experts about the magic effect of pheromones and the way they work. The signals sent by pheromones are perceived through the organ called the Vomeronasal Organ (VMO). Pheromones mainly occur through sweat or urine. These signals are further transferred to the part of the brain called the “hypothalamus”, which is responsible for one’s emotions, hormones, reproduction, and, of course, sexual behavior.
Although it may seem that the amazing effect is reached through the smell, the real attraction is reached by means of chemical response to the signals from pheromones. And the entire process occurs on the unconscious level and usually leads to certain behavior like strong attraction, horniness, and rising interest in a certain person. Pheromones are a relatively recent discovery that explains the way people choose themselves partners on a subconscious level. In fact, even when we are not communicating with people verbally, we still do communicate with them by means of chemicals flying in the air.
Unfortunately, nowadays there is a tendency to reduction of the number of pheromones produced by own body. The main reason for that is the evolution process of humanity as people started to use odorant treatment items in everyday life that kill the magic effect of pheromones. In the morning we take a shower with soap or shower gel and apply deodorant and clothing, so as a result, we have got a clean and sweet-smelling body with skin totally covered with clothes
So I don’t see how pheromones are supposed to overcome the borders in the face of foreign fragrances and clothes coverage. Taking into consideration all of the listed morning procedures, it doesn’t turn out as a big surprise that the amount of pheromones produced by own body is not effective enough in attracting others. Moreover, some scientists argue that only about 80% of humans have the VNO organ as it gradually became useless due to its disuse over the years.
Even though the effect of pheromones was developed relatively recently, the outcome they produce is not something to be questioned. There were many experiments performed with this groundbreaking phenomenon testing and the results showed a high success rate when they are applied.
In the everyday life, men can observe the effect of pheromones through eye contact and flirtatious smiles by women. Pheromones spread their magic effect not only on people of the opposite sex but also on everybody who is around giving them an aura of calmness and relaxation.
Despite the fact that there has been lately a wide choice of perfumes with pheromone effects, I could barely believe they have nearly as great an effect as real pheromones have. So, don’t have implicit faith in the loud words in ads of scents with pheromones. Even though the level of natural pheromones produced by one person is “prescribed” genetically and couldn’t be changed, one can start disseminating more scents with pheromones by limiting the use of various perfumed body treatment items. And don’t get surprised to observe the great increase in the number of times women will approach you!
Five Secrets of a Successful First Date The tips that will guarantee an effective date
After careful consideration and reflecting upon romantic experiences we present our essential guide for a successful first date. The dating tips we offer are summarized in five essential points. However, the most important knowledge is hidden between the lines. Please read carefully so that you would be able to find out the truths that will be most applicable in your dating life.
1. Make a plan
Planning is the foundation of every type of success. If you go with the flow you will end up where it leads you. In this way, it is not quite sure if you will get to your desired destination. This advice applies even to the most talented improvisers. So, you need to plan (at least when you do not have solid experience) all aspects of your date. Where will you take the girl, what will you both do, what will you talk about, what will you want to know from her? In planning, you would need to consider every eventuality.
For example, to what place you will take her if things go extremely well. Such a place might be another restaurant, your home, a hotel room, a friend’s apartment, or somewhere else. In order to assure your success you always need to have a backup plan. If your first idea fails, be ready with another one – equally interesting and original. Some women expect to spend the evening changing different locations. So, keep in your head a good number of exciting ideas. It is important that your home is in a decent state – prepared for any event. Do not miss any opportunities – otherwise, there is a great chance not to see your date anymore. Women hate men who do not notice and do not take advantage of the chances they are being offered.
2. Extend the best invitation.
Invite her in an original and non-traditional way. It is always good to show that you are not just someone from the crowd.
Generally, it is good to be romantic. In a world where courtship is gradually becoming less popular, a romantic guy would be quite a refreshing sight for every girl. The place where to extend the invitation is quite important as well. Personally, I would say that the dancing floor is one of the best options. There you are presented with the chance to get to know each other on a basic level. And if you are not a dancer, please learn. Dance creates a special connection between two partners, which is impossible to achieve in any other way. Whatever you decide to do, spice it up with humor. Humor helps people relax. And when the girl starts to consider you as a source of laugh and joy she will definitely accept your invitation.
3. Choose a proper activity.
Choose an interesting and mutually engaging activity for your date. The conversation would probably be one of the most important aspects of the night, so try to do things that will allow you to talk to each other. Be mindful of the topic of the conversation. Never make notes on the first date that you’re looking for a serious relationship, that often scares people, both men, and women. Try talking about funny things, jokes, and anecdotes, but not very embarrassing ones. Start a good on a topic that is interesting for both of you. This is important because it will leave an option for another discussion and subsequently a second date. It is recommended on the first date not to talk about your past relationships, otherwise, your date will not feel comfortable listening to you. And… please avoid mentioning your mother!
4. Be interested in the girl.
If your goal is simply to have sex with the girl, it will be quite difficult to achieve it. In reality, you do not need to know the woman that well, if you only want to have sex with her. Most women, however, right here have a strong radar for your intentions. If you show no interest in the girl’s personality and apply only pressure, it is pretty obvious what you want from her. If the woman looks for other things and wants something more than just sex (which is the most common case) – you will be disappointed and probably will not see her anymore. Thus, it is important to be anxiously interested in the person you went out with- not just pretending. Do not try to mislead her that something in her is interesting for you. Find a few things pertaining to her personality, which are appealing to you, and talk about them. In this way, you will learn more about the girl you went out with. Even if you want just sex you will have to invest some interest in your date – at least a basic level. This is a fact
5. Sit next to her.
This is a mistake that most guys do. Men who have no experience with women do not understand that a meeting with a woman has nothing to do with a business appointment, where we gather to discuss new projects or the ending of the financial year. Women are very emotional creatures and you cannot charm them or impress them with only dry words (unless they are very desperate). Always try to sit close to her, at one hand distance.
Bonus tip: choose restaurants with sofas and not with chairs. On the sofa, it is much easier to sit next to her and to influence her through radiance or a touch. This is called kinesthesia – touches, fondling, hugging, kissing, even your smell – these are much more powerful than just words, voice, and body language. The proper use of these tools will bring you serious success for a short amount of time. Of course, these tips will vary with culture and personality. But I feel that they could give pretty good guidance for people without a good dating background. And never forget to keep trying, it will at least give you experience. Go out there and good luck!
Men Do Not Like Skinny Women
So those men that get turned on by women that are generally considered to be overweight or Skinny Women shouldn’t be ashamed of their preferences, as it is absolutely natural. In this article, we are describing the main reasons why men favor women that do not completely meet the modeling standards.
The waist-hip ratio is defined by dividing the circumference of a waist by the circumference of the hips. This exact ratio becomes the main determiner of a woman’s attractiveness. For instance, in western countries, the ratio that is equal to 7 is considered to be the most appealing among men. And it was found during the research that this ratio shows an optimal level of female reproductive hormones, and thus a lower likelihood of diseases. As for Asian countries, the ratio equal to 6 is the most attractive. Whereas in the majority of African and Latin-American countries, the preferred ratio is 8. So, it comes out that women with a more curvaceous body make men salivate rather than skinny women, who are less likely to have a distinct difference between waist and hips.
More fat means fertility
Considering the fact that women’s bodies are intended for childbearing, which takes a long period of time, women should be the storers of natural fat. Back in ancient times when people lived in caves and it was hard to get enough subsistence, women that had fat on their bodies were more likely to carry a child. As for fetal nourishment, the energy from fat on a woman’s hips is the one, which is converted into energy for fetal nourishment. Moreover, some scientists argue that the long-chain polyunsaturated fatty acids that are contained in hip fat are significant for fetal brain development. So, men get attracted to women with some meat on their bones because they receive some hidden signals from their brains. These signals inform that these women are more likely to give birth to a healthy child.
Body mass index (BMI) is considered a stronger indicator of women’s attractiveness than the waist-to-hip ratio. BMI is defined by dividing a woman’s weight by height squared. Women whose BMI falls into a normal range are more eye-catching as it shows good overall health as well as reproductive potential. A normal BMI range lies between 18 and 25. Women whose BMI is close to 19 are more fertile than thin women because lower BMI is generally associated with poor health, eating disorders, and bad fertility due to amenorrhea.
Men love breasts and bums
During the study that was published in Biological Sciences in 2004, it was found that bigger breasts are associated with higher levels of mid-cycle estradiol and progesterone, which means that during the ovulation period these women are more likely to conceive. So, chubby women with bigger breasts are more appealing to men, as skinny women are less likely to have big boobs unless they have implants.
In fact, approximately 50% of American women are overweight and obesity becomes the number one issue in the world according to the World Health Organization. We don’t call women gaining extra weight in order to become more attractive. No, men are more likely to fall for women that take care of themselves and maintain a healthy balance of muscle and fat. Healthy eating habits and an active lifestyle- are the main things that make women look fascinating.
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